by Holly Parmer (Ste. Genevieve, MO)
God our Father, & Lord of all Creation:
We gather here now to celebrate the love and commitment of (bride) & (groom), as they share their first meal together as husband and wife.
We thank You for giving Your Holy blessing today upon their marriage, and ask that You continue to bless them with Your love and mercy throughout their lives together.
Let this be the first of many loving meals shared together with their family and friends, and blessed by Your amazing grace.
And with (bride) & (groom), as we are their family, friends, & loved ones gathered here in Your presence,
we ask for Your Holy blessing upon this meal as together we say:
Bless us, oh Lord, and these Thy gifts, which we are about to receive from Thy bounty; through Christ our Lord, Amen.
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~ Meal Blessings ~
I usually stay till about 45 minutes after the scheduled start time. This gives me time to pack up my PA, congratulate the parents, give you the book that I read your ceremony from and sneak in a quick kiss from the newlyweds. Usually time prohibits me from staying to give a blessing at dinner. However in the case of an evening wedding it is usually an option and there is an extra charge of $100.00. for the extra time spent. The Meal Blessing, like a reading, is also another way to give a friend or family member a place of honor in your day. Although I do plan on writing some of my own soon, these were culled from the archives of the American Association of Wedding Officiants. If you are an officiant and you wrote one of these please send me an email so I can give you credit and a link!
Jamie & Brian – They were married on February 20th 2010 at the Riviera in Massapequa. It was a beautiful day and though a little cold they got great outdoor photos as well as indoor ones. For a couple as interwoven into the fabric of who one another are as this couple they didn’t need the weather to increase the snuggle factor…. But how great do the look together!
~ “The Wedding Prayer” ~
by Robert Lewis Stevenson
“Lord, behold our family here assembled. We thank you for this place in which we dwell, for the love that unites us, for the peace accorded us this day, for the hope with which we expect the morrow, for the health, the work, the food, and the bright skies that make our lives delightful; for our friends in all parts of the earth. Amen”
“Lord God, as we sit at Your table, the table that You have filled with the earths bounty for our celebration, bless us all and the food that we are about to share with the Bride and Groom in their first meal together as Husband and Wife. As food nourishes the Body, so does love nourish the soul. May our conversation this day remind us of how true this is and may we offer one another strength and support. Grant that this meal enrich us with wisdom and laughter enough that it’s memory shall last for the rest of our days. Amen
“A Secular Grace”
“For what we are about to receive
let us be truly thankful
…to those who planted the crops
…to those who cultivated the fields
…to those who gathered the harvest.
For what we are about to receive
let us be truly thankful
to those who prepared it and those who served it.
In this festivity let us remember too
those who have no festivity
those who cannot share this plenty
those whose lives are more affected than our own
by war, oppression and exploitation
those who are hungry, sick and cold
In sharing in this meal
let us be truly thankful
for the good things we have
for the warm hospitality
and for this good company.”
“Let us pray, Heavenly father, you have placed the earth and it’s fruit under our care so that by our efforts we may insure that all will share in the benefits of your creation. We ask that you bless this food and all those that are present here today, the families and friends and also all those who are were unable to attend today. We also ask your blessing on bride and groom who have come to you this day to unite themselves to You in love and sacrament, all this we ask in your love. Amen
“We come to the table not merely to refresh our bodies but to renew our hearts. We are thankful for food in a world where many walk in hunger, for friends in a world where many walk alone, and for faith in a world where many walk in fear. O Lord, Thou Sustainer of our body, heart and soul, Bless all we receive. In thankfulness. Amen
“Dear God: Thank you for the food we share this afternoon in celebration of this marriage. We thank you for the love, guidance and support of all the important people in their lives, their parents, family and friends We offer our gratitude for this joyful and abundant day. Please bless those that have worked hard to make this day a success for this couple. And, please bless this meal that we are about to share – our Bride and groom’s first meal together as a married couple.”
“Lord God, Creator of the universe, Father of us all, we have gathered here around this dinner table to celebrate the love and commitment that have united this couple in a wonderful bond of marriage. Bless, Father, this food that we are about to receive with grateful hearts as a sign of your continuous bounty and providence. May your generous blessing descend also upon these newly married spouses, their families and friends present here at this joyful banquet. We make this prayer in the name of Jesus our Lord and Savior, who lives and reigns with You and the Holy Spirit, one God for ever and ever. Amen.”
www.churchofancientways.org
A month ago, James and Ashley asked if I would offer the grace before the meal at their wedding reception. Of course, I said yes right away. While I’ve officiated at a lot of weddings, I’ve had fewer opportunities to offer a table grace, and I felt honoured by their request. Here is the introduction and prayer I offered, followed by a few helpful tips and other sample prayers in case you ever have the privilege of saying grace for a wedding reception.
The Introduction and Prayer
It’s a joy for me to know James and Ashley as uniquely gifted individuals and as a wonderful couple. They are talented and kind, and you know, they’re so organized that not only did they ask me weeks ago for this prayer, but last night James was Facebooking me, “Just writing to remind you about the grace before dinner tomorrow!”
As if I could forget such a privilege of offering a prayer before the first meal that they share together as husband and wife!
So as we pray for this meal and wedding celebration, let’s also pray for James and Ashley and their future together. I’m excited at what God will do in their lives.
O God, the great Creator of this beautiful setting and all that is,
the Lord of life and love,
we give you thanks for all of your goodness:~ for the abundance of food this evening
~ the abundance of family and friends,
~ the abundance of laughter and love.
We pray that this meal might be a time to nourish our bodies
and nourish strong relationships.We pray for James and Ashley that the love they share today would flourish and grow.
May they continue in your joy and strength.
May they bless their families as they have been blessed by them.
And may all of us who participate in this celebration,
carry your joy and love with us as we move forward.
For you are the Source and Ground of all being. Amen.
A few helpful tips:
Start early. Don’t wait until you’re driving to the wedding, or having to madly scribble down some notes while hiding in the washroom between the ceremony and the reception. Jot down your thoughts a week or two before the wedding so you can be well prepared.
Write it out. Speaking off the cuff is great if you can pull it off, but for a smooth delivery so people can focus on your words and not get distracted by the uhs and ums, write out what you want to say.
Say it out loud. Practice it enough so you know it, but not so much that you squeeze the life out of it.
Give your prayer an introduction. Share briefly how you know the couple or what you appreciate about them. Include a short anecdote. Be funny if you can–but think gentle humour instead of embarrassing story.
Keep your focus on the bride and groom. Remember the occasion isn’t about you or your marriage. You might have the microphone for a few moments, but use it to draw attention to the happy couple, not yourself.
Really pray. The prayer before the wedding meal isn’t for show. It’s a real opportunity to pray for the meal, for the couple, and for all those present. Think sincerely, what do you want to pray for the couple? What do you want to pray for the family and friends who have gathered?
Make it a keepsake. For an added touch, print a copy of your prayer and tuck it into your wedding card for the couple.
More Prayers:
These are a few selected excerpts of prayers before the wedding meal. Click through for the rest of the prayer and more samples.
Lord God, Creator of the universe, Father of us all,
we have gathered here around this dinner table to celebrate the love and commitment
that have united (bride’s name) and (groom’s name), in a wonderful bond of marriage. – Dinner Prayer At Wedding Reception
We thank You for giving Your Holy blessing today upon their marriage, and ask that You continue to bless them with Your love and mercy throughout their lives together. Let this be the first of many loving meals shared together with their family and friends, and blessed by Your amazing grace. – Wedding Meal Prayer by Holly Parmer
We have come from many places, many backgrounds, many beliefs, but and have drawn us together to share this meal together, their first meal as a married couple. We are grateful for love which seeks us and finds us. We are grateful for this meal. – Wedding Prayers for the Meal
Lord, behold our family here assembled. We thank you for this place in which we dwell, for the love that unites us, for the peace accorded us this day, for the hope with which we expect the morrow, for the health, the work, the food, and the bright skies that make our lives delightful; for our friends in all parts of the earth. . . . – The Wedding Prayer by Robert Louis Stevenson
Father we thank you for the food that we are about to partake. We ask you to take your place at our tables and be our special guest. As this food nourishes our body and mind, let your Spirit feed our souls. – Scribbles of an Event Planner
May we never forget those who . . . are in need and may our eyes and our hearts be alert and our hands be open to give from the abundance you have given us. As we break bread together, we remember your sacrifice and know that you are among us. – Prayer Before Dinner
We thank You for providing for us, we ask that You bless this food, and bless those who have worked to prepare it. Thank You for being in our midst, for allowing us to enjoy good fellowship, and for being the perfect example of love. Just as this meal nourishes us and makes us healthy, we ask that You will give this couple a long and healthy life together. – Wedding Prayers and Blessings
Writing/Reflection Prompt: Imagine you’ve been asked to offer a prayer before a wedding dinner, and try writing one of your own. Or if you’ve already written a prayer, consider sharing it in the comments below. I’d love to see what you come up with!
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Prayer is the glue that holds a marriage and a family together. Prayer comes in many forms, including: recited prayers, such as the Hail Mary; spontaneous prayer, as a husband and wife might say before bedtime; praying with Scripture; and that perfect prayer–the Mass.
The book, Catholic Household Blessings and Prayers, is an excellent resource for your marriage as you explore the Catholic tradition of prayer. Here are some excerpts:
Blessing of an Engaged Couple
The betrothal of a Christian couple is a special occasion for their families, who should celebrate it together with prayer and a special rite. In this way, they ask God’s blessing that the happiness promised by the engagement will be brought to fulfillment. When the engagement is celebrated within the circle of the two families, one of the parents should preside.
When the families have gathered, all make the sign of the cross.
The leader greets those present in the following words:
Brothers and sisters, let us praise our Lord Jesus Christ, who loved us and gave himself for us. Let us bless him now and forever.
R/. Blessed be God forever.
In the following or similar words, the leader prepares those present for the blessing.
We know that all of us need God’s blessing at all times; but at the time of their engagement to be married, Christians are in particular need of grace as they prepare themselves to form a new family.
Let us pray, then, for God’s blessing to come upon this couple: that as they await the day of their wedding, they will grow in mutual respect and in their love for one another; that through their companionship and prayer together they will prepare themselves rightly and chastely for marriage.
One of those present or the leader reads a text of sacred Scripture.
Listen to the words of the first Letter of St. Paul to the Corinthians: 13:4-13
Love is patient, love is kind. It is not jealous, love is not pompous, it is not inflated, it is not rude, it does not seek its own interests, it is not quick-tempered, it does not brood over injury, it does not rejoice over wrongdoing but rejoices with the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
Love never fails. If there are prophecies, they will be brought to nothing; if tongues, they will cease; if knowledge, it will be brought to nothing. For we know partially and we prophesy partially, but when the perfect comes, the partial will pass away. When I was a child, I used to talk as a child, think as a child, reason as a child; when I became a man, I put aside childish things. At present we see indistinctly, as in a mirror, but then face to face. At present I know partially; then I shall know fully, as I am fully known. So faith, hope, love remain, these three; but the greatest of these is love.
Or John 15:9-12: This is my commandment: love one another as I have loved you.
Reader: The Word of the Lord.
R/. Thanks be to God.
The intercessions are then said.
Leader: God our Father has so loved us that in Christ he makes us his children and the witnesses of his love before the entire world. Let us, therefore, call upon him in all confidence, saying:
R/. Lord, help us to remain always in your love.
God our Father, you willed that your true children, brothers and sisters in Christ, should be known by their love for one another. R/.
You place upon us the sweet demands of love so that we may find happiness by responding to them. R/.
You call N. and N. to the communion of life and love that binds the Christian family together, mind and heart. R/.
The engaged couple may exchange rings or some other gift that signifies their pledge to each other.
One of the parents may bless these gifts:
N. and N., in due course may you honor the sacred pledge symbolized by these gifts which you now exchange.
R/. Amen.
The leader says the prayer of blessing with hands joined.
We praise you, Lord, for your gentle plan draws together your children, N. and N., in love for one another. Strengthen their hearts, so that they will keep faith with each other, please you in all things, and so come to the happiness of celebrating the sacrament of their marriage. We ask this through Christ our Lord.
R/. Amen.
The leader concludes the rite by signing himself or herself with the sign of the cross and saying:
May the God of love and peace abide in you, guide your steps, and confirm your hearts in his love, now and forever.
R/. Amen.
The blessing may conclude with a suitable song.
Prayer of a Future Husband
Adapted from Tobit 8:5-7
Blessed are you, O God of our ancestors, and blessed too is your name forever. Let the heavens bless you for evermore and all the things you have made. It was you who created Adam, you who created Eve his wife to be his help and support; and from these two the human race was born. It was you who said, “It is not good for the man to be alone; let us make him a partner like himself.”
I take N. in sincerity of heart. Have mercy on her and on me and allow us to live together to a happy old age.
Prayer of a Future Wife
Adapted from Psalm 16
Keep me, O God, for in you I take refuge; I say to the Lord, “My God are you. Apart from you I have no good.” I bless the Lord who counsels me; even in the night my heart exhorts me. I set the Lord ever before me; with him at my right hand I shall not be disturbed. Therefore my heart is glad and my soul rejoices, my body abides in confidence.
You, O Lord, will show me the path to life, fullness of joys in your presence, the delights at your right hand forever.
Blessing of a Son or Daughter Before Marriage
In the days immediately before the wedding, the family may gather around its member who is to be married, perhaps at a special meal in the family’s home.
All make the sign of the cross. A parent begins:
Let us bless the Lord, by whose goodness we live and by whose grace we love one another. Blessed be God forever.
R/. Blessed be God forever.
Then the Scripture is read:
Listen to the words of the Book of Deuteronomy: 6:4-7
Hear, O Israel! The Lord is our God, the Lord alone! Therefore, you shall love the Lord, your God, with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your strength. Take to heart these words which I enjoin on you today. Drill them into your children. Speak of them at home and abroad, whether you are busy or at rest.
Reader: The Word of the Lord.
R/. Thanks be to God.
The parents may give a Bible or crucifix to the one who is to be married. Then all join in prayers of intercession for the couple to be married and for the world. After the Lord’s Prayer, the parents and other family members place their hands on the head of their son or daughter as one or both parents speak the blessing.
May the Lord, who gave you into our care and made you a joy to our home, bless you and keep you.
R/. Amen.
May the Lord, who turns the hearts of parents to their children and the hearts of children to their parents, smile on you and be kind to you.
R/. Amen.
May the Lord, who delights in our love for one another, turn toward you and give you peace.
R/. Amen.
All make the sign of the cross as the leader concludes:
May the God of love and peace abide in you, guide your steps, and confirm your heart in his love, now and forever.
R/. Amen.
Table Blessing for Weddings
This blessing may be used before the meal at a wedding reception. A member of the wedding party or one of the parents of the newly married couple may serve as the leader.
When everyone has gathered at table and the meal is ready to be served, all make the sign of the cross.
Leader: Blessed be God who has brought us together in joy.
R/. Blessed be God forever.
The leader introduces the blessing in these or similar words:
We have gathered here to celebrate the love of N. and N. God has brought them together, and we pray that God will hold them in his love always. As the food we share will strengthen our bodies, may our time together strengthen the love that binds us.
After a time of silence, the leader prays:
Let us pray. Lord God, you sustain all creatures and never cease to give your children the food they need. We bless you for bringing us together in the love that unites us around this table where the food we take strengthens our bodies. We pray that, nourished by your Word, we may grow ever stronger in faith as we strive for the coming of your Kingdom. We ask this through Christ our Lord.
R/. Amen.
Blessing on Anniversaries #1
When the household and friends have gathered, all make the sign of the cross.
The leader greets those present in the following words:
Blessed be the God of all consolation, who has shown us his great mercy. Blessed be God now and forever.
R/. Blessed be God forever.
In the following or similar words, the leader prepares those present for the blessing.
We have come together to celebrate the anniversary of the marriage of our brother and sister. As we join them in their joy, we join them also in their gratitude. God has set them among us as a sign of his love and through the years they have remained faithful (and have fulfilled their responsibilities as parents). Let us give thanks for all the favors N. and N. have received during their married life. May God keep them in their love for each other, so that they may be more and more of one mind and one heart.
One of those present or the leader reads a text of sacred Scripture.
Listen to the words of the first Letter of St. Paul to the Corinthians 1:4-9
I give thanks to my God always on your account for the grace of God bestowed on you in Christ Jesus, that in him you were enriched in every way, with all discourse and all knowledge, as the testimony to Christ was confirmed among you, so that you are not lacking in any spiritual gift as you wait for the revelation of our Lord Jesus Christ. He will keep you firm to the end, irreproachable on the day of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is faithful, and by him you were called to fellowship with his Son, Jesus Christ our Lord.
Reader: The Word of the Lord.
R/. Thanks be to God.
The intercessions are then said.
Leader: In the tender plan of his providence, God our almighty Father has given married love, its faithfulness, (and its fruitfulness,) a special significance in the history of salvation. Let us therefore call upon him, saying:
R/. Lord, hear our prayer.
Father all-holy, you have made marriage the great symbol of Christ’s love for his Church; bestow on these your servants the fullness of your own love. For this we pray: R/.
Father all-holy, the faithful one, you ask for and respond to fidelity to your covenant; fill with your blessings your servants who are celebrating their wedding anniversary. For this we pray: R/.
It is your will that all married life should be a lesson in Christian living; grant that all husbands and wives may be witnesses to the wonders of your Son’s love. For this we pray: R/.
The leader says the prayer of blessing with hands joined.
Lord God and Creator, we bless and praise your name. In the beginning you made man and woman, so that they might enter a communion of life and love. You likewise blessed the union of N. and N., so that they might reflect the union of Christ with his Church: look with kindness on them today. Amid the joys and struggles of their life you have preserved the union between them; renew their marriage covenant, increase your love in them, and strengthen their bond of peace, so that (surrounded by their children) they may always rejoice in the gift of your blessing. We ask this through Christ our Lord.
R/. Amen.
Blessing on Anniversaries #2
Almighty and eternal God, you have so exalted the unbreakable bond of marriage that it has become the sacramental sign of your Son’s union with the Church as his spouse. Look with favor on N. and N., whom you have united in marriage, as they ask for your help and the protection of the Virgin Mary. They pray that in good times and in bad they will grow in love for each other; that they will resolve to be of one heart in the bond of peace.
Lord, in their struggles let them rejoice that you are near to help them; in their needs let them know that you are there to rescue them; in their joys let them see that you are the source and completion of every happiness. We ask this through Christ our Lord.
R/. Amen.
The leader concludes the rite by signing himself or herself with the sign of the cross and saying:
May the God of hope fill us with every joy in believing. May the peace of Christ abound in our hearts. May the Holy Spirit enrich us with his gifts, Now and forever.
R/. Amen.
Exerpts from Blessings and Prayers for Home and Family (c) Concacan, Inc, 2004. Used and adapted by permission of the Canadian Conferene of Catholic Bishops.
Excerpts from the English translations of Book of Blessings (c) 1988, International Committee on English in the Liturgy, Inc. (ICEL). All rights reserved.
Bring prayer into your marriage! Use Catholic Household Blessings and Prayers to:
- Learn the “by-hearts”-the prayers that every Catholic needs to know by memory
- Practice the simple form of the Liturgy of the Hours as a family
- Celebrate the feasts and seasons of the Church year in ritual and prayer
- Bless the Advent wreath, Christmas crèche, and Easter foods
- Lead grace before and after meals
- Pray for family members
- Bless the home before a move and in times of trouble
Additional Resources:
- The Couple Prayer Series
- Rite for the Blessing of a Child in the Womb (USCCB)
www.foryourmarriage.org
