I pray that Elizabeth will return to me so we can be married in the eyes of the Lord. I actually purchased a ring after her last letter telling me not to contact her again. Now that is faith. I have nothing to go on except you God. Remember the movie “Build it and they will come.” I thought that was appropriate for purchasing a ring. Purchase a ring and she will return.”
Although she has written me a letter to not have any contact with her, I pray that she retracts that letter with another letter inviting me to have montly contact or weekly contact just for dinner only. Dear God we need eye to eye contact in order to come back together. I pray that she has a change of heart and not seeing coming back to me as going backwards but rather a new begining of a potentially beautiful life together with clear and open communication.
God I know I have made lots of mistakes in this relationship which I consider to be a marriage. I have written 4 letters of amends offering help and support and each time she rejected anything from me. The last time she told me not to ever contact her again signing the letter love Elizabeth. That last part God is so very confusing.
I know she is a very frightened women of finances. I also believe there is no other man in her life. If there is than please God give me the strength to let go and send me the women for this ring I am paying on. I hope to have it paid for in three months. However, if there is no other man in her life, please soften her heart and help her see that a 2nd opportunity might be a new start. Its very painful to be walled off from someone I love very much.
God please soften Elizabeth’s heart for me and to have loving thoughts of me as I have of her. There was more good in this relationship than bad. Please help her with her finances. I offered and she rejected any financial help I offered.
God hear my prayer.
Return to Marriage Prayer
Here are 5 prayers for reconciliation in relationships between spouses.
Prayer of Forgiveness
I know that You seek to have us always be in a right relationship with You and sometimes I do things that grieve You. I know that I do and say things that grieve my spouse too so I am asking You to give me the right words to say to be reconciled to my spouse. I know I have made many mistakes and have asked for forgiveness from them but it seems that it hasn’t restored our marriage to where we’re both in a right relationship with one another and I know You desire us to be in one. I need Your help. Please send me Your Spirit to show me what I might have done wrong that I was not even aware of and soften my spouse’s heart to accept my faults and extend forgiveness to me so that we can worship You together in the way that is pleasing to You and in the way You intended a husband and a wife to be joined together in offering You thanksgiving, praise, and honor. I know that in my own inadequacies I cannot fully understand how to always say the right words or do the right things but it is my desire to be reconciled with my beloved mate and it is in the strong name of and for the glory of the name above all names, Jesus Christ my Lord, Amen.
Prayer of Blessing
Great God in heaven,
I am asking You for Your forgiveness for things that I have done to You that are clearly sinful for I am surely not sinless (1 John 1:8-10) and forgive me for those things that I have obviously done wrong to my spouse to hurt them and cause them pain. I am asking You to bless my spouse and help them to understand how far I fall short of the perfect spouse and I pray for Your help in knowing how I can help to restore this relationship and make it more of the way You originally intended for us to have a right relationship with one another and with You. I know that my prayers have sometimes been hindered because of my own stubborn heart and unwillingness to be a greater servant of my spouse and to love them in the way that You have loved me, even dying for me while I was Your enemy (Rom 5:10) and a sinner (Rom 5:9). Please extend to me Your mercy and grace and allow me to treat my spouse in the way that You love me unconditionally and not treat them the way that I often do. I need Your help in doing these things and again, bless my spouse and I thank You for my spouse and for Your forgiveness, love, and grace and in the precious name of the Savior, Jesus Christ I pray, Amen.
Prayer of Reconciliation
Father in heaven,
You have reconciled me to Yourself through Your Son’s precious blood and so I am begging You to help me be reconciled to my beloved spouse. Only You can change the human heart (Prov 21:1) so I ask You to change my heart to be one that seeks to humble myself and seek reconciliation in my relationship with my mate. Too often I speak without thinking and I know my words hurt my spouse but this is no excuse for the things that I speak to them. I ask for Your Spirit to be sent to help us be reconciled with one another as Your Son’s precious blood was shed for our being reconciled to You (2 Cor 5:18; Col 1:20). This I pray for Your Son’s most holy name and for His glory, Amen.
Prayer of Restoration
You are in the restoration business; restoring me by giving me Your Spirit. You have made me into a new creation in Christ (2 Cor 5:17) and I am pleading with You to help me restore this marital relationship with my beloved spouse. How often have I done things out of pure selfish ambition and gain? I cannot count the times where I was only looking out for my own interests and not that of my spouse. Please forgive me for my selfishness and help our relationship be restored to the way it previously was. I need Your help in doing this because I don’t always know the right thing to say or do and I lack Your wisdom in acting out of a sincere and genuine heart that is motivated only by serving my spouse and loving them in the way that You love me. What more can I do to help in restoring this relationship to where You would have it be? Help me to think, act, and speak in ways that would reflect Your own love and for this I pray in the precious name of the Great Son of God, Jesus Christ, Amen.
Prayer of Repentance
I repent of my sins and my sins against my spouse. I am so sorry and I need to tell You and my spouse that I have sinned. Let me be humble in approaching them by telling them that I have sinned against them by the way that I have acted or by the words that I have used. I know that I don’t always treat my spouse in the way that I am supposed to because there are many times that I am still more concerned about myself more than I am my spouse. I need to esteem my spouse, to cherish my spouse, and to extend to them the same grace and mercy that You extended to me, even though I didn’t deserve it. Help me to understand that I cannot fix relationships on my own. Only Your Spirit can give me a tenderer heart and please soften my spouses heart too so that they can accept my apologies and to let them know that I often act out of impulse and pride. Help me to know the right words to say to them so that I can show them that I have a repentant heart and seek to be reconciled to them in our relationship because the relationship between a husband and wife is supposed to reflect that of the relationship that Jesus Christ has with me and with the church. For this I pray for the Son of God’s glory and in His name, Amen.
Maybe you’ve prayed such a prayer before. I know I have and I also know that I’ll need to again being I am a fallen creature. I need God’s help in knowing how to pray and how to seek forgiveness and to love my spouse in a way that shows her that I do and not just depend on words alone. Can you comment by giving us your own prayer so that we might know what to pray and how to pray it?
Take a look at some Bible verses about marriage: Bible Verses About Marriage
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Broken relationships are a part of the broken world that we live in. Whether a romance that fell apart, friendships that ended in a fight, or rumors that destroyed our place of community, most of us have gotten beaten up by it, some worse than others.
And in the Church, that knife can drive even deeper.
Since we’re all part of the body of Christ, shouldn’t we always get along with each other perfectly and just sort of float around on Sunday mornings on little clouds of Shekinah glory? If this is the case at your church, email me, because I want a piece of that. But for us here on Earth, this is generally not the case. And because this isn’t the case, we need to know how to be an active part of God’s restoration work in making broken things whole. Starting with our relationships with our brothers and sisters.
But before I set out the most crucial steps in the process, I have to lay the foundation for everything else I’m about to say, which is this: You must be rooted in your identity in Jesus Christ. If you don’t start with a firm grasp on that, finding reconciliation is like finding your way home with a compass that always points back at you. You have to know that God is our Dad. That He has been in love with every part of us since the beginning of time. That He paid in blood, sweat, and tears so that He could get His family back from the murderer who stole us away. You have to understand that Dad already won the fight. But you’re still pretty messed up from all that time you spent getting lied to and beaten up before Dad got you back. And your brothers and sisters are still pretty messed up, too. But you’re back with Dad now. You don’t have to live like you’re still out in the cold.
Once you know that, you’re ready to tackle step 1.
Step 1: Know, without doubt or reservation, that you can do nothing to repair the brokenness in the other person’s heart.
Contrary to what our initial impulse is, we have to remember that we are not in the business of making broken things whole or healing the deep hurts of the soul. Dad has to be the one to do that. Your role is to tear down all the barriers of pain or resentment that you put in their path, then step back as Dad sits down beside them and helps them start picking up the pieces.
Step 2: Pray hard and listen carefully.
If you’ve never really understood what people mean when they say, “Prayer is a conversation, not a monologue,” now is the time to find out. Most of us approach prayer like we do a diary. But here’s the thing: you’re not journaling. You’re talking to your Dad. He’s sitting quietly on the couch in front of the warm fireplace, sipping a cup of steaming hot chocolate. He looks up at you and smiles. He just so happens to have a second cup next to him, just waiting for a certain someone. So wander over to the couch, plop down next to Dad, and talk to Him. Tell Him what’s going on in His favorite kid’s life. He already knows, but He likes to hear it from you anyway.
Step 3: Apologize.
No apology, no reconciliation. Pretty simple. But go one step further: be the first to apologize, rather than wait for the other person to own up to their part first. Fact: it takes two people to mess up a relationship. It takes three to mend it. You can’t help Dad break down the roadblocks of hurt and resentment that you’ve built up (intentionally or unknowingly) while insisting you didn’t do anything wrong. You’re going to have to be vulnerable. You’re going to be uncomfortable. But don’t push away. Don’t use half-apologies to avoid the heart of the issue. Own your actions. Matthew 5:23 says, “Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled with them; then come and offer your gift.”
Step 4: Surround yourself with wisdom and godly advice.
Sometimes, mending a broken relationship is as simple as giving out that apology, and the two of you can start fresh. But more often, it is a process that takes time, effort, and a tenacious will to engage in uncomfortable conversations. If you’re going to do this well, make it your business to seek out wise men and women that love Christ and embody wisdom and discernment, and ask if you can have their ongoing support and guidance as you work through some tough times. If you don’t really have someone in a mentor role in your life, it’s not as intimidating as it sounds. Essentially it’s as easy as finding someone in your church you want to be like, and spending time with him or her. Ask him questions. Soak up the wisdom that she gives you. Look closely at his thoughts and life patterns, and if that lines up with biblical truth, adopt them into yours. But be careful here—if you’re not completely gut-level honest with the people you invite to speak into your life (and with yourself) and serious about following their guidance, their input is pointless.
Step 5: Know that in some cases, the most necessary thing to do is step away.
There are some relationships so broken that even after a long season of prayer, earnest pleas for forgiveness, and acting on wise advice, there are barriers that can’t be torn down by human hands. Once you’ve set aside every barrier you possibly can, it’s time to take a few steps back and ask Dad to step in and be Dad. A word of warning: This is a step that should not be taken without the utmost earnestness of prayer and an abundance of wise counsel; it will often be perceived as a fresh wound of betrayal.
Okay. Take a deep breath, we made it through. You all right? I know that was pretty heavy. Breathe.
Friends, there is no more direct road to sanctification than active reconciliation. It’s tough. It’s messy. But walking into the process of reconciliation with hands and heart wide open will allow God to hunt down and destroy the strongholds of pride and pain in your life. He’s Dad. He loves us outrageously, completely, and without restraint. And He knows how much we hurt ourselves and everyone around us when we clench our fists so tightly around our pride and our hurt.
But don’t worry. Dad’s pretty good with fixing this kind of stuff.
Heavenly Father, I thank You for Your grace which You so generously, and continuously, bless us with. You are worthy of all praise and all glory. I lift my hands in humble worship and adoration. Bless and empower my words and thoughts today, O Lord that they may be pleasing to you, my Rock and my Redeemer.
Romans 12:9-10 Don’t just pretend that You love others. Really love them. Hate what is wrong. Stand on the side of the good. Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other.
1 Peter 4:8 Most important of all, continue to show deep love for each other, for love covers a multitude of sins.
Guide and direct our relationship
I pray that You continue to guide our footsteps and our lives as we walk in agreement, according to Your will. I trust that our new relationship is a blessing from You, O Lord and I pray that You guide us and show us what we need to know.
Open the eyes of my heart, Father God, and reveal anything that is not of You. May I not go into this relationship love-blind but rather spirit-wise.
Proverbs 13:20 He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm.
Corinthians 6:14 “Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?”
Open the eyes of my heart, Father God, and reveal anything that is not of You. Click To Tweet
Draw us closer
Bless our relationship and draw us both even closer to You and to your will for our lives. May I never be unequally yoked.
Lord, teach and guide us that we will always seek You first in everything we do. May our love be fill with genuine affection and may we honor each other at all times.
1 Peter 3:7 In the same way, You husbands must give honor to Your wives. Treat her with understanding as You live together. She may be weaker than You are, but she is Your equal partner in God’s gift of new life. If You don’t treat her as You should, Your prayers will not be heard.
Proverbs 31:10,11 Who can find a virtuous and capable wife? She is worth more than precious rubies. Her husband can trust her, and she will greatly enrich his life.
Bond us together
Bless our lives in our journey together and fill us with Your Glory. May we be bonded together, Lord, in the type of love Your Son Jesus showed on the cross.
Let our lives be a wonderful reflection of Your grace, as we abide in it forever. In Jesus’ name, I humbly pray, Amen.
1 Corinthians 13:4-8
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.